Saturday, June 6, 2009

Metablog: SCOTT MCCLOUD FUCKING SUCKS

Victor: In this very special wehatethiswebcomic.blogspot.com blog entry, we are reviewing an old draft (4/23/09) of a review of a Scott McCloud comic on the internet somewhere (now lost) that I started when I was pretty drunk. We never finished it because I think Owen has complicated feelings about Scott McCloud...

BEGIN QUOTED TEXT:

Victor: SCOTT MCCLOUD SUCKS DICK THIS GUY SUCKS SO HARD HIS DRAWINGS SUCK HIS STORY IS BORING LIKE ONE SENTENCE INTO IT, WHAT SOME DUDE AND A CHICK IN SPACE KISSING AND TALKING ABOUT SHIT? FUCK YOU! THIS IS THE WACKEST SHIT. WACK AS FUCK. WHY THE FUCK DO PEOPLE LIKE THIS GARBAGE?

Owen: I am sensing some anger.

Victor: Come on, you don't hate this dude? Don't you hate dude?

Owen: Um, well, actually, after I read Understanding Comics, I tried to get Wesleyan to pay for him to speak there. But they wouldn't. And then I stopped thinking about him until right now, and like the few times we've made fun of him before. So I can't say I hate him, but I probably will if I read any more of his online comics.

Victor: Wesleyan didn't pay for it cause they knew he sucked. This dude is fucking stupid. What the fuck is this stupid bullshit?

Owen: No one at Wesleyan knew who he was. Maybe it would help if you articulated your hatred a little more specifically.

END QUOTED TEXT

Owen: I still haven't thought much about Scott McCloud. He wrote a book that attempts to use a lot of academic sounding theory about narrative and aesthetics or whatever, and a lot of make sense but a lot of it feels like some Freudian shit or something, because it's mostly about what makes sense to him and I think a lot of people believe it because it's written as a comic book and no one else has tried to do anything similar. But it becomes very suspect when you consider that he has no other successful comics, and his fictional work sucks a lot. But, still, I don't feel angry.

Victor: No yeah, I think we've even mentioned briefly in an old entry of wehatethiswebcomic.blogspot.com (or in real life) at some point that we both dug Understanding Comics but his other shit was pretty wack. But yeah, I guess I would have probably gone to see dude speak. He's like a Freudian William Carlos Williams.

Owen: William Carlos Williams? Really? I don't get that at all, but I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt that you know what you're talking about.

Victor: He's the black dude from Star Wars. But you wouldn't get that cause you're not a Trekkie like me.

Owen: Fuck no. You fucking loser. Wait, there's a black dude in Star Wars?

Victor: You know who's a fucking loser? SCOTT MCCLOUD.

Owen: When I was talking to him about coming to Wesleyan he said he needed two hotel rooms or something because he travels with his wife and two kids. I think, I could be misremembering that. Anyway, the dude has a wife and two kids and makes a living drawing bullshit. He doesn't care if he's a loser.

Victor: Yeah he does.

Owen: Okay.

Victor: I WIN!

Owen: Fuck.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Do you guys like anything? I mean seriously, the world is like, a place full of emotion and good things, and all you can do is hate on web comics, WTF. I used to like your band until I found out what dicks you are and now I don't like your songs and when I start to tap my foot to them I hold my foot still because I REFUSE TO LIKE YOU.

KOOL A.D. said...

FUCK YOU I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU WHO IS THIS? I'LL KILL YOU! IS THIS SCOTT MCCLOUD? YOU'RE DEAD SCOTT MCCLOUD!

Elena said...

Well! This was all very funny. You two are very special.

I will tell you my favorite part: "But, still, I don't feel angry."

Dap said...

I feel conflicted: Although Anonymous is a clearly a knobber and enjoys men in ways I find revolting, I agree with him completely. What to do?

WV: CLYMU